kdreamz.com

Let’s face it - English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple.

English muffins weren’t invented in England or French fries in France. Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren’t sweet, are meat.
We take English for granted.

But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

And why is it that writers write but fingers don’t fing, grocers don’t groce and hammers don’t ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn’t the plural of booth beeth? One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, 2 meese? One index, 2 indices?

Doesn’t it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend, that you comb through annals of history but not a single annal? If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?

If teachers taught, why didn’t preacher praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? If you wrote a letter, perhaps you bote your tongue?

Sometimes I think all the English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane. In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell? Park on driveways and drive on parkways?
How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and wise guy are opposites?

How can overlook and oversee be opposites, while quite a lot and quite a few are alike? How can the weather be hot as hell one day and cold as hell another.

Transport: we drive on the parkway and park in the driveway; cargo comes by air and shipments by road.

Have you noticed that we talk about certain things only when they are absent? Have you ever seen a horseful carriage or a strapful gown? Met a sung hero or experienced requited love?

Have you ever run into someone who was combobulated, gruntled, ruly or peccable? And where are all those people who ARE spring chickens or who would ACTUALLY hurt a fly?

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which an alarm clock goes off by going on.

English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race (which, of course, isn’t a race at all). That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.

And why, when I wind up my watch, I start it, but when I wind up this essay, I end it.

I recently took a blogger’s test here and guess what.. This is what they had to say

You Are a Pundit Blogger!

Your blog is smart, insightful, and always a quality read. Truly appreciated by many, surpassed by only a few

he he..now i’m not going to argue with that

Captain’s log: 05:50 Hrs
Perimiter Assesment: Check
Status: Mutt Still In Zone
Action: Abort Mission…Abort Mission

I knew it was a good idea….Jogging is great.

It was a beautiful morning. The morning dew had set in and the everything looked fresh. The road was empty and there was absolutely no traffic, What a great day to start jogging. I started with a brisk walk…i planned on increasing the pace slowly coz i did not want to pull a hamstring. Which made me think do pigs pull ham strings?. i rounded off the corner and slowly started to jog…my plans were simple, jog around the 1st and 2nd main road…trot around andal nagar and finally when i reach optimum speed run back home. I had it down phat but that’s when it happened…a stupid mongrel in the street started chasing me…it was not your normal street mutt it looked like a cross between a bulldog and a shitsu….I’ve named him “bullshitsu”. Anyways I ran back to my apartment building as fast as my legs could take me half expecting a set of jaws to close in on my bottom…which oddly made me think, Why do they call it your “bottom”, when it’s really in the middle of your body? Anyways Its surprising how fear can make you do crazy things. I jumped over the compound wall in one smooth motion ran into my flat and crashed into the Sofa. I felt pretty good about jumping the wall…i kind of felt like superman who could leap over the tallest building in a single bound but then again why would superman want to leap over a building if he can fly?

I knew it was NOT a good idea….Jogging is for dogs

This is a test blog. Yes… i am trying yet another blog client. I was not happy with the other one